


So You've Pinned Me To The Mat Now Make It My Mattress

by witnessfortheprosecution



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Assault, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enthusiastic Consent, Feelings Realization, Fluff and Humor, Hickeys, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Janus Sanders Has a Heart, Light Dom/sub, Logic | Logan Sanders is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Making Out, Minor Violence, Second-Hand Embarrassment, Self-Defense, Self-Reflection, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Talking, Therapy, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Virgil Sanders/Patton Sanders (minor), because what would a fic of mine be if I didn't make one of the characters have hickeys, guys I promise I don't have a marking kink, he talks a lot about... y'know..., it's implied - Freeform, that they are fwb but most likely won't expand beyond that, typical remus nsfw language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:34:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24364378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/witnessfortheprosecution/pseuds/witnessfortheprosecution
Summary: Janus is on his redemption arc and teaching the others self defense. So what if he gets tangled up in the sheets with a flustered nerd, that's just all part of it.
Relationships: Logic | Logan Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 38
Kudos: 234





	1. Fighting and Blushing

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is going to be 3 parts!! There is some growth and character development but really I just wanna some good Loceit make out vibes

“Self defense.” Janus opened, staring at the other 5 people across the mat from him in a make-shift row, “It is vital to know and important to learn. Today I am going to be teaching you some basic moves to keep yourself out of harm's way,” 

“You had me at ‘harm’s way’!” Remus said enthusiastically. 

“That was the last thing I said,” 

“Well, then it’s a good thing you said it,” He chuckled wickedly, Janus rolling his eyes in response. 

Virgil scoffed, raising his hand slightly, “I still do not understand what we are doing here,” 

“Self defense,” Logan said, confused. He looked to his left at Virgil, “Were you not listening at all?” 

Virgil groaned, “Yea, I know that, I just meant  _ why  _ are we here?” 

Patton put a hand on Virgil’s shoulder, “Because Janus asked all of us to be here and we should be nice and attend his class,” 

Virgil turns to face Patton more, speaking in a lower voice, “Pat no one important is listening, you don’t have to pretend to care about him,” 

“I am literally standing right here,” 

“I know what I said,” Virgil cocked an eyebrow in Janus’ direction, causing him to scoff. 

“I’m just here ‘cause I’m bored,” Roman said, engrossed in whatever is on his phone, “Either this or go to my uncle’s funeral,” 

“Our uncle died?” Remus asked, baffled. 

“Did you not read my Twitter feed?” 

Janus groaned, “Whether you’re here because I asked or you genuinely want to learn or boredom, it is important-” Janus plucked Roman’s phone out of his hands, “-to pay attention,” 

Roman gasped, “Hey! That was my phone! You better pray I didn’t miss a text,” 

“In the two seconds he’s had your phone?” Virgil deadpanned. 

Roman took two steps forward and snatched his phone back, holding it up, triumphantly, “17 messages, all of them important!” 

Janus wrestled Roman’s phone away from him, “Give me that,” He muttered, marching over to a counter across the room, setting it there, becoming increasingly frustrated with the eclectic group, “Need I remind all of you the reason we are doing this is because 5 different members of the LGBT Alliance have been assaulted in the past 5 weeks?” 

There were mutterings of acknowledgement and sighing. 

“Gee, Jay, you really know how to bring down a room,” Virgil said with malice. 

“And that’s coming from him,” Remus chimed in. 

“I am so sick of this,” Janus muttered, gripping the bridge of his nose, “Can you…” Janus gestured at Patton, a silent plea. 

“Oh, right, okay,” Patton stepped forward slightly, “Everyone, this is important, and we should listen to what Janus is saying. I know most of us are not… On the greatest terms with him,” 

“He pushed me down the fucking stairs,” Virgil growled. 

“He caught my old laptop on fire and then lied about it for months,” Logan said, coldly. 

“He took my phone!” Roman yelled. 

“I get it,” Janus held up his hand, silencing the commotion he felt forming, “I have done a lot of bad, but please believe me when I say I do…” He swallowed thickly, “Regret it. Except the phone thing, Roman you have a problem,” He sidebarred, but took a breath turning serious once again, “I am not sure how I can gain any of your trust fully, but I do want to try to help you if you’ll let me. 

“And I think we should,” Patton chirped. 

The others looked at each other and back at Janus, shrugging their shoulders. 

“I suppose, if Patton and Remus are okay with you, you’re alright in my books,” Roman ran a hand through his hair, giving a small smile to Janus, which he returned gratefully. 

“I still hate him,” Virgil said, arms crossed, giving Janus a look that could turn a man to stone. 

Logan frowned, “Eh… Hate is a strong word, but I also share Virgil’s thoughts of mistrust,” The expression on Logan’s face was unreadable, which unsettled Janus even more. 

Janus had a nasty habit of manipulating people to his will, getting them to do favors for him, experience emotions that they may have not felt otherwise, maybe sprinkle a few lies to get them on his side. A nasty habit he was in the works of breaking. Most people bent to his will, but Logan’s a rock, something that Janus found as frustrating as it was comforting. 

“You can leave if you want, I do not care” Janus stated the lie simply. Them leaving would render his entire plan of their trust to be useless. 

“I am not so closed minded that I do not think I cannot learn something from someone I do not particularly trust,” Logan shrugged, “It would be negating any biased research ever done. You have to look at it from a different lense, but there is still something there, so I’ll stay,” 

“I’ll stay too,” Virgil said. 

“Okay, fantastic,” 

“But I want it to be known it’s for selfish reasons,” Virgil crossed his arms. 

“Why would you want that to be known?” Logan asked, confused. 

“I don’t want anyone here thinking I was inspired by Logan’s lame comment (“Rude,”). Patton is my ride home, my phone is at 6%, this is my best option,” He said in quick succession. 

Janus shook his head, exasperated, “Okay, whatever keeps you here.” He clapped his hands together, “Let’s get started then,” 

*****

“Very nice, well done, Virgil,” Janus told him after he evaded wrist lock and took down his attacker, being played by Roman. 

Virgila adjusted his hoodie, “Don’t patronize me,” 

Janus rolled his eyes, “Fine. I was attempting to be positive but if you are going to be like that,” He held up his fingers, counting Virgil’s mistakes, “Your form was sloppy; you need to be aggressive when doing the take down, they are not always going to be so willing to go down without a fight; and never go on one knee after the take down, you wanna keep the high ground advantage you have,” 

“Oh look, some honesty,” Virgil sassed, making his way back to the others. 

Janus tapped Roman with his foot, “You can get up too, good work,”    


“Thanks!” 

“Okay, I believe that is all we have time for, we only have this room for 5 more minutes and I don’t have time to teach anything else, so, uh, this sucked, you all learned nothing, get out of my class,” 

Virgil rolled his eyes, making a beeline for the door. 

Janus merely sighed and looked at Patton, who pursed his lips and shook his head, “You know I do not approve of his behavior, right?” 

Janus tried to not let the hurt show on his face, instead maintaining a neutral expression, “He will come around again, I am sure,” 

Patton walked up to Janus, “I think so too. You did a great job today! I really actually learned a lot. Are we doing this again?” 

Janus frowned, “Would you want to?” 

“It was nice being able to spend time with everyone,” Roman piped up, walking towards Janus and Patton, “You’re a good teacher too. I have trouble focusing sometimes, but I never zoned out,” 

Janus thought for a moment. This was just going to be a one off instance because of the assaults, but you can never know too much self defense. Plus, exercise is good for mental health, and this group desperately needs more of it. 

“Fuck it, sure. Since this time works for everyone we can just do this again next week if everyone is on board,” 

Patton smiled and Roman held up his hand to high-five Janus. He was trained better than to let anyone know how he was feeling, but right now he was feeling shock and a bit of elation. Janus had always had trouble with friends, always falling into the wrong crowd or more often just by himself, but this one bit of solidarity has him feeling… Well he is not sure what he was feeling. 

“Wait, you are doing this again?” Logan walked up to the three, overhearing their conversation. “I thought this was just a one off attempt to get you on our good side,” 

“Well, of course it was, I do not care about any of you, just needed to clear my conscience,” Janus said, flippantly, with a wave of his hand, before sighing and shaking his head, “No, sorry, force of habit. It was originally just a one off attempt but that was just because I was worried.... That none of you would come. And I wouldn’t even get the chance to try to help any of you,” He confessed.

“Were you…” Roman shook his head, “Did you just correct your own lying?” 

Janus nodded, “I have been working on being more honest. Like with forgiveness, unlearning your bad habits is a process, at least that is what my therapist tells me. I am not one to grovel or say “I’m sorry”, so I thought I would try to give you all a skill you can take with you instead. Kind of like a present, but better, because you’re learning,” He gestured towards the group, who thought about it, before nodding. 

“Also you all desperately need to exercise more. It raises your life expectancy and it is crucial for your mental well-being, the only person dying young and tragically is me,” 

Roman and Patton laughed and Logan smiled in his direction, “First you’re teaching a class in a skill I don’t even know, now you’re advocating for self improvement, therapy, and mental health?”   


Janus raised an eyebrow, “Have I tricked you into liking me yet, Specs?” He smirked, winking at Logan. 

A faint blush appeared on his face, before Logan opened and closed his mouth, and instead of saying anything, just walked away. 

Remus frowned, walking up to the group after changing his clothes, “What was that about?” 

Roman’s face looked ecstatic as a nefarious grin spread across his face, “I think, Logan’s coming back to self defense,"


	2. Types of Attraction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan works with the twins to figure out his feelings and becomes very aware of them during the next self defense session.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy, another chapter.  
> Remus is heavily featured in the first part of the chapter, so be warned of him and typical Remus NSFW language.

“Logan loves Janus, Logan loves Janus!” Roman shouted, spinning Logan around in his office chair. 

“Getting dizzy…” Logan muttered, but Roman didn’t care. 

“Don’t deny it, you love him, you love each other, you’re gonna date and give each other a thousand kisses,” 

“Going down,” Logan said too calmly for a man falling off of a rolling chair and onto a solid hardwood floor. 

“I am so happy my little nerd is finally in love again!” 

“Ew, no, I don’t love anyone,” Logan said, standing up, rubbing his hip where he fell, “You are getting way to excited about all this,” 

“I gotta agree with brainiac over here,” Remus spoke up from the couch, sitting upside down with his feet over the back and head on the floor, “He isn’t in love with Janus, he probably just wants his snake dick in his booty,” Logan and Roman both had different levels of exclamations. Roman yelling gross and Logan blushing a flaming red and denying every word. “I’m just saying, that’s the vibe I got,” 

“Well then, you need to do another… another….” Logan grabbed his flashcards off the end table, flipping through them, “Do another ‘vibe check’,” He looked at the twins who looked at one another, shrugging (“Eh, we’ll give it to you”). “I do not harbor any romantic feelings towards Janus, nor do I want his ‘snake dick’, whatever that means,” 

“It’s ‘cause of the, y’know, the snake tattoo on his arm. He’s a shady guy... snake dick?” Remus struggled with his justification and his brother sighed, shaking his head. He groaned, sitting upright on the couch, “Fine, next time I’ll say ‘horse cock’, ‘cause from what I heard, homeboy is  _ packing _ ,” 

Logan put his head in his hands, attempting to hide his blush that was impossibly red now, sitting in his office chair and groaning. Roman runs a hand through his hair, “Remus, that’s enough,” 

“What? All I’m trying to say is that Janus has a huge pe-” 

“If you say ‘penis’ I will strangle you with my bare hands,” Roman stood up straighter, making fists with his hands. 

“I wasn’t going to,” Remus scoffed, and Roman raised his eyebrows, “I was going to say pe… nis. Okay, yea I was talking about his dick, but please don’t attack me, Ro. I’m fragile,” 

Roman breathed heavily out through his nose, “I will spare you this time, but only because Logan desperately needs our attention,”

“Who, me?” Logan groaned, his voice still muffled by his head in his hands. 

“Yes, you, you fool,” Roman grabbed Logan’s shoulders sitting him upright, “I apologise, Remus and I got distracted by our own banter-” 

“- as we often do,” 

“Correct. Tell us how you are feeling,” Roman said softly, leaving his side to sit next to Remus. 

Logan chuckled, weakly, “Come on now, you know I don’t feel anything,” 

The twins looked at each other and back at Logan, raising an eyebrow, “Really?” They said in unison, unimpressed. 

Logan rolled his eyes, “I mean I don’t feel anything in regards to Janus,” He said, cooly, lying through his teeth, hoping they don’t notice. 

Roman shook his head, “Boo! Stop lying, try again,” 

Logan pulled one leg up onto his chair, hugging it while picking at the skin around his fingernails. He hates conversations like these, “I mean, I don’t think I do,” He bit his lip, and used his other hand to run his hand through his hair. 

Roman sighed, “I never wanna tell anyone how they are supposed to feel-” 

“- but I feel as though in this instance we know better than you,” Remus continued. 

“Mainly just because-” 

“- you’re so bad with your feelings,” They said in unison again. 

Logan made a face like he just ate a lemon, “You guys know it freaks me out when you do that- that twin thing,” 

“Can you at least listen to what we are saying?” Roman pleaded, leaning forward so his elbows are on his knees. 

Logan sighed, putting his leg back on the floor, sitting more upright, “Fine, I suppose I will discuss with you.. how I am... feeling,” 

There were many seconds of silence while Logan was trying to gather his thoughts. I mean, his feelings, what even are they? He had a moment of weakness one time earlier today, big deal. People find others attractive all the time without harboring any feelings towards them. Though, was it just that one moment of weakness? Or have there been other instances like this that Logan just covered up better or forgot. 

“Uh, you gonna say anything, Lo-” 

“Hush, he’s thinking,” 

Logan has had many instances where he found his friends attractive. Virgil and himself went to the planetarium, and Virgil was the most beautiful man in the galaxy, surrounded by fascination and wonder with the stars. Patton and Logan once made muffins for the theater troupe and seeing him with flour on his face, glasses askew, his laugh was the most wonderful sound in the world. But Janus… When he watched him in class-- debating so calming and intelligently, his words flowing smooth like silk and his theatricalities were mesmerizing-- it made him feel something. Something different than what he felt with anyone else. It was a feeling that stayed, even after the laptop incident. It is a strange feeling, one not unfamiliar to him, but he is not sure if it is welcome. 

“I am just… Confused. About my feelings. Towards, him,” Logan stated, flatly. 

Roman nodded, “Confused how?” 

Logan licked his lips and scratched the side of his nose, “I find Janus attractive. However, I find many people passably attractive. However, I also have feelings I don’t quite understand attached to… his… face,” Logan frowned, tilted his head back and gripping the bridge of his nose, realising he probably didn’t make any sense, “This is stupid,” He muttered. 

“No, no, not stupid!” Remus yelled, waving his hands, “You’re just getting frustrated because your head is ‘thicc’ but heart itty bitty. When it comes to feelings, you’re Mr. Smooth Brain,” 

Logan blinked twice before turning to Roman, “Translation?” 

“He is saying you are getting easily upset with yourself because facts and logic comes so easy to you, but emotionally you struggle, so you would rather just not deal with it rather than having to maybe be confused,” 

Logan breathed in through his nose, “Okay… I suppose that makes sense. But I mean, I am presently thinking about my feelings and J- and him, and I still am unsure of what to make of him, or them, or-- this is my hell,”

Roman stroked his chin, “Maybe it is because you are thinking about them too much on your own,” Logan tilted his head, prompting Roman to explain, “Right now your feelings are incredibly abstract, like a beautiful Kandinsky. What you prefer is a clean, simplistic Mondrian, but, heh, it is no longer 1931-” 

“There is a lot of information you’re saying that no one understands,” Remus shook his head. 

“Is this how annoying I am when I talk like this?” Logan frowned. 

Remus made a ‘kind of’ motion with his hand, pursing his lip, and Roman shook his head, “Sorry, what I am trying to say is your feelings are not as simple as a math or science equation: there is no correct answer at the moment. It is all muddled because you are remember only certain events with Janus rather than how you actually feel at the moment,”

“Okay…” Logan slowly nodded, “So, what do you suggest I do?” 

“Follow your heart, of course!”

“That’s the worst answer,” 

Roman groaned, “No Nerd-kola Tesla, I mean you have certain feelings towards Janus that you don’t understand so you should spend more time with him and work those feelings out. Live your destiny! Let the petals of love grow and flourish,” 

Logan made a disgusted face, one that Remus was matching, “Gross. There was some good advice in their somewhere Lolo, you’re a smart guy you can sift through the-” 

“- very pretty imagery, yes. Thank you. Both of you, this actually helped,” 

Remus stood up, adjusting the holes in his ripped black jeans, “Oh goodie, now that that is finished I can go meet up with this  _ delicious _ Grindr man who is dtf,” Remus cackled as Roman rolled his eyes. He threw his jacket over his shoulder, walking towards the door, “I’ll be back in a few, later sluts!” 

“You don’t have to be!” Logan yelled as the door was closing, “You don’t live here!” 

Roman scoffed, putting his feet up on the couch, pulling out his phone, “I apologise for his behavior, sometimes I cannot believe we are related,” 

“Roman you don’t live here either!” Logan exclaimed. 

***

“Okay, self defense class, day two!” Janus clapped his hands together, “I am surprised to see we have a full class again,” Janus spoke vaguely but everyone present knew he was specifically talking about Virgil being in attendance again. 

“Yea, well, whatever.” Virgil grumbled, “Patton bribed me to come again,” 

“Virgil!” 

“Sorry Pat, they have a right to know,” 

Remus smiled, “Well, we all know what that is code for!” Remus dramatically pointed at Virgil and Patton, “It means these two are fucking!” 

Patton squeaked and covered his ears, shaking his head, and Virgil covered his eyes, groaning. 

“It absolutely does not mean that, Remus,” Logan said, defending the embarrassed pair. 

“Oh really? Well then, what was the bribe then, Vee?” Remus crossed his arms, still smirking. 

Virgil opened his mouth to answer then closed it again, shaking his head. He then turned his attention to the front of the room, “Hey Janus, now would be a good time to step in… An-and teach us something. Please,” Virgil half-shouted awkwardly. 

Janus nodded, “Yes, Remus, be quiet now,” Remus threw his arms up, offended but didn’t say anything more, “So, today we are going to be doing some grappling drills and teach you how to avoid ending up on the ground or, what you can do once you find yourself there,” 

Logan nodded, diligently hanging onto every word he was saying. He had not run into Janus since that day, Janus himself having come down with a cold and skipping the class they had together. Logan supposed now was the time to figure out exactly what his feelings towards Janus were. 

Logan had found a list of 5 main types of attraction: sexual, sensual, romantic, platonic, and aesthetic. He just needed to determine which tier his attraction fell into. He knows that a part of his attraction is platonic, seeing as they were friends far before his feelings began causing a problem, but they were not exactly close, so it is entirely possible that this whole issue stems from wanting to be closer friends with Janus. Only time will tell. 

“We have already discussed that last session that the ‘power position’ is to have a vertical advantage on your opponent,” 

“So, basically, you wanna be tall?” Roman interjected. 

“Well, no, you just wan-” 

“Sorry, Virgil,” 

“Oh, fuck off,” 

Janus cleared his throat, getting everyone’s attention once again, “It is sometimes helpful to have the height advantage yes, but, I was more referring to being upright versus on the ground. I can explain it slower if you want, Roman,” Janus smirked, causing a few people to stifle a laugh.

Roman clicked his tongue, “Touche, Jay,” 

“So-” Janus pulled off his jacket and threw it against the wall, “What we are going to be doing is running some drills. I will first demonstr-” 

Logan determined that aesthetic attraction is  _ definitely  _ on the table. Janus continued talking but Logan tumbled into his own fantasy, staring at Janus’ arms as he stretched them. He rarely ever wore short sleeves, let alone a tank top, so it was a whole new viewing experience that made Logan’s palms sweat and his breathing short. He knew Janus was toned, but he never really paid any attention to him, never had a reason to. Now all Logan could think about were Janus arms, and chest muscles, and back muscles-

“Logan volunteers!” Two people said in unison. 

Logan shook his head out of his trance and looked to his right to see the Prince twins giving him a thumbs up and a knowing smile. 

“Oh, yes, it is  _ totally  _ volunteering if the person does not ask for it themselves and it is forced upon them,” Janus rolled his eyes, shaking his head at Roman and Remus. 

“No need to worry, Janus, I will be the volunteer, I suppose. It seems to be what the masses want,” 

Logan stepped forward and ran a hand through his hair, so wrapped up in his own world he does not know exactly what he signed up for, which is making him much more nervous. 

Janus took a couple steps towards him and reached towards his face, which made Logan freeze in place, attempting to control a blush he felt forming. He closed his eyes and felt the glasses pull off his face. He opened his eyes (the world a little blurrier, but not unmanageable, his prescription was not really that high) and saw Janus holding the arm of his glasses, twisting it with his fingers. 

“I am sure you want these breaking hmm?” He smirked and Logan said nothing, just nodded, dumbly, as Janus put his glasses on the counter. He then positioned himself a decent distance away from Logan, steadying his feet, Logan copying the same motion, “Okay Logan, so I am going to come at you and you are going to do the grapple technique I demonstrated on the dummy,” 

“The dummy?” Logan asked, and sure enough, a few feet off the mat there was a training dummy lying face down, “Oh, right, of course,” 

Janus nodded, “Now, do not forget that the most important thing is to protect your head like I showed you. You most likely are not going to do the grapple successfully at first, and that is okay. If you feel unsafe, just say stop,” 

The rational part of Logan’s brain was to tell Janus to show it to him again. Lie a bit and say he is tired and zoned out or that he did not understand the first time. Nevertheless, the gay part of his brain focused on Janus’ collarbones and jawline, which was deemed more important than rationality. 

“I understand, go ahead,” Logan said, calmly for the fire alarms that were going off in his brain. 

Janus walked towards him and suddenly grabbed his wrist and hooked his leg behind his ankle, pulling it off the ground. Logan squinted his eyes, remembering Janus describing what to do in retaliation, but it was all just a big fog. Logan lost his balance and began to fall backwards. In a moment of panic, he grabbed the front of Janus’ shirt to pull himself upright, but gravity was stronger than both of them and they tumbled to the ground, Logan hitting his head on the mat, hard. 

“H- holy shit Logan, are you okay?” Janus exclaimed. Logan’s eyes were closed but he heard the sound of socked feet making his way towards him. 

“Is he alright?” 

“Should we sit him up?” 

“Logan, are you okay?” 

Logan groaned and opened his eyes, slowly. Janus was directly above him, and only now was Logan aware that his hands were next to Logan's head and he was straddling his waist. Logan’s head hurt, but his heart was pound once he became fully aware of the compromising position, Janus’ eyes filled with panic, his hair ruffled and hanging over his face. Logan studied Janu’s face a bit more, his nose a bit crooked from the times it had been broken, his parted lips showing his pearly white teeth, gorgeous olive skin and- since when has Janus had freckles? He closed his eyes hard, hoping he could just sink through the floor. 

“Logan, buddy, stay with us,” Janus said, and reach up to cup his face. This made Logan’s eyes shoot wide open as he made an embarrassing sound between a whine and a groan. 

“Oh dear, he sounds really hurt,” Patton said, kneeling down next to him, rubbing his shoulder. 

“Hmm, yes. Hurt,” Janus said, squinting his eyes, his hand trailing down from his face across his neck and chest and landing on his waist, right near where his leg is, the entire time Logan was struggling to keep his breaths steady. The worry that was present in Janus’ eyes was gone and was present with something else- something more devious and smug, paired with a smirk that only Logan could see. Janus stood up and offered his hand to Logan. He hesitated but took it. Janus pulled him up with more force than necessary, Logan stumbled forward, his chest flushed against Janus’. Logan gasped quietly, trying to steady himself, he let go of Janus’ hand but he just used that as an opportunity to put a gentle hand on the small of Logan’s back, “Careful, don’t want you losing your balance again,” He raised his eyebrows slightly and it took all of Logan’s willpower to not melt into him. 

“C’mon kiddo,” Patton grabbed Logan by his biceps and led him towards the chair on the side of the room, “We should sit you down, check to make sure you don’t have a concussion,” 

He doesn't. He knows he doesn’t, the pain was already almost gone, but the last thing Logan wanted was to be in the same room as everyone, “Y’know Pat, I think I should just go to my physician,” 

“Oh, are you sure? We can come with you-” 

“No!” Logan exclaimed, but shook his head, “No, honestly I don’t want a lot of people there, I can just go by myself,” 

“No, that’s stupid, I’ll drive. Everyone else can stay here,” Virgil pulled the keys out of his pocket and threw an arm around his shoulders, “Anything to get me away from here,” He muttered. 

“Agreed…” Logan said back, “Please, everyone, continue in my absence,” 

Patton nodded, “Of course Lo! We’ll teach you when you’re better,” 

Janus smirked, “Absolutely. I would love to do a private one-on-one session with you. Is something you might enjoy, Specs?” 

Logan didn’t answer, his mouth was left agape, luckily Virgil said something for him, “Oh, right, your glasses Logan,” 

Logan untangled himself from Virgil grasp and went for the doors, “Oh, it is quite alright, I’ll just by new ones,” 

“Wha- Logan?” 

“See you in the car, Vee,” Logan opened the doors to the outside, the cool air welcoming and embracing, giving him a clearer head. 

He reviewed the events in his head as he looked for Virgil’s car: he zoned out during the demonstration, fell over because he wasn’t paying attention, had a gay panic when Janus was touching and straddling him, left because Janus know about his feelings. 

Damn it, his feelings. Sexual, sensual, romantic, platonic, aesthetic… They were all there during the very short session. And Janus knows. 

Fuck, Janus knows. 

Logan found Virgil’s car and hit his head against the roof. This wasn’t going to end well. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go, comment if you enjoyed!  
> Follow me on Tumblr: thealphabetmurders


	3. Feelings Make Me Sick... Let's Kiss Anyway

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janus and Logan talk about their feelings. Well, "talk".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are at the end. This is wrapped up a bit shorter than I thought but I didn't feel the need to drag this on for any longer. There is lots of kissing and love and awkwardness in this. Also, a lot of sexual tension for no smut.

Janus ended class early that day. With Logan’s injury and Virgil gone, Patton was taking the role of an anxious mess. That, paired with the Prince twins’ constant bickering, Janus ultimately decided they could pick up lessons another day this week. All that to say, Janus was also distracted himself. 

After taking many psych classes and just being generally knowledgeable in human behavior, Janus was able to pick up on signs pretty quickly. However, until recently, Janus had received no signals that Logan was even interested in him in any capacity past friendship. Last week, he assumed, was just a fluke. He assumed the nerd doesn’t know how to respond to flirting, even though it was something Janus did often, so he did not think about it much. 

Today, however, was a much different story. There was no getting around the redness on Logan’s cheeks, his blown out pupils, shallow breaths, or how his eyes kept flickering towards Janus’ lips. There was also the small fact of him having to leave the gym entirely because of his presence. 

This is why Janus was currently standing outside Logan’s dorm, after a few hours of waiting with a shower and clothes change. Janus fiddled with the collar on his shirt; he would be lying if he said he was not nervous. Logan has an icy intimidation to him that unnerves him slightly. He feels a bit better after seeing him as a flustered mess, but there was always that fear of Logan destroying him with an eyebrow raise or a well-timed fact or insult. 

He took a deep breath and rapped three piercse knocks. There was shuffling behind the door and he heard what sounded like the clack of a ceramic mug. 

“Who is it?” Logan’s voice rang out, hoarse and weak, almost as if he just woke up. Janus then put two and two together and realised he might have been sleeping. The physician visit must not have been all that fun. 

Janus sunk his shoulders and lowered his voice, getting into character, “It’s Virgil. Wanna open the door?” 

The door opened and Logan’s eyes widened at the sight of Janus before he was rolling them, “Why do you always do that?” 

“Why do you always fall for it?” Janus quipped. Logan fiddled with the hem of his frayed, oversized navy shirt, with plaid pajama pants to match, “Did I wake you?” Janus asked.

Logan shook his head, “I did have a nap, yes, but I woke up about 20 minutes ago,” 

Janus hummed, the awkwardness beginning to settle in, “How is your head doing?” 

“I am alright. As I suspected, there is no concussion. Just took some Aspirin and had some rest,” 

Janus frowned, “‘As you suspected’? Weren’t you the one to insist on going to the physician?” 

Logan’s eyes widened, “Uh, well, yes. However, that was related in a different way and not because of the head thing and… um…” He hung his head, “I am not making this any better,” 

Janus smacked his lips and nodded, “No, you are not. May I come in?” 

Logan bit his lip and made room to let Janus pass. As adorable as Logan looked with his bed head and casual wear with a constant, flustered blush, Janus prayed that he wasn’t actually making him uncomfortable. 

He removed his Oxfords (as Logan has a strict “no shoes in the dorm” policy) and mustard overcoat with red accents, hanging them on one of the hooks right next to the door. Janus looked around at the organized mess that was Logan’s room. An overflowing bookshelf with old texts sitting next to an end table, coffee mugs strewn about the room, broken pencils on the ground near the desk- a minefield that Janus could not even try to decipher. 

“If I knew you were coming I would have tidied up a bit more,” Logan said, sheepishly, moving the coffee mugs and ashtray off the end table and onto the window sill. 

“Why do you have an ashtray?” 

Logan sighed, “I get stressed sometimes and I… have shame cigarettes,” He sighed, attempting to hide it behind the mugs in a more discreet place. “I really would not appreciate a lecture right now,” 

Janus hummed, “I wasn’t going to give one,” 

“Then what are you doing here?” 

He raised an eyebrow, “You and I both know why I am here,” Logan sighed in response, sitting down on the bed, running his hand through his hair. “May I sit?” 

Logan nodded and Janus sat down on the bed, a safe distance away from Logan. The pair didn’t say anything for a while. The silence was awkward. Not uncomfortable, just awkward, because they both know they have things they need to say. 

“Logan-” 

“I’m-” 

They both started at the same time. Janus chuckled, embarrassed, and gestured for Logan to continue. 

“I’m sorry, for the way that I reacted, after our demonstration ended up on the ground. I had been trying to work out what my feelings towards you were and it seems as though I am… attracted to you, in some way. I would rather be up front about it rather than beating around the bush. It is unclear as to what exactly my feelings towards you are- a- and I just hope I am not making you uncomfortable…” Logan suddenly hunched over, putting his head between his knees, “Oh God…” He muttered. 

“L? What’s going on?” 

“Apologies. Whenever I talk about my feelings I sometimes get a bit physically ill,” Logan told him, his breath a bit labored. Janus bit back his laugh and Logan looked at him through the corner of his eye, “Go ahead and laugh, it is absolutely ridiculous. I remember back at community college I once went to a club with a friend and we ended up making out there. The next day they took me out for breakfast to talk about ‘what this means for our relationship’ and the entire time I barely spoke and could not eat because I felt so nauseous,” He sighed, “It’s a real problem,” 

“Would it help if I spoke instead?” Janus smiled fondly, rubbing soft circles in between Logan shoulder blades. Logan nodded and Janus’ heart swelled, just being able to be so close to Logan, physically and emotionally, “Well, I like you a lot, Logan. I enjoy how clever you are, how we can talk for hours and it seems like minutes, I feel as though I can be myself around you and I do not have to feel bad for who I am.” Janus chuckled to himself, “That was actually something my therapist said I needed to work on- was to find people to be around that don’t make me feel as though I need to lie, that I am good enough just being myself.

“I am not sure what my feelings are towards you yet, honestly I am surprised you can even stand me after everything I have done… But I would like to find out,” Logan sat up and Janus grabbed his hand, rubbing his thumb across his smooth knuckles, “If that is something you want,” 

Logan did not speak for a while. He looked down at Janus’ dark hands contrasting with his own pale complexion. Janus bit his lip, worried he did something or said something to make Logan uncomfortable. He then put his hand up to Janus’ face, the other leaning into the touch. His thumb danced over the scar striking through Janus’ left eye, a story he might tell the others some day. Logan’s thin, brown eyes met with Janus’ wide ones, the tension in the air thick. 

Logan then made the first move, surging forward and capturing Janus’ lips in a heated kiss. Janus moved his hands, placing one on Logan’s waist and the other tangled in his straight, black hair. 

Janus never expected Logan to kiss, to behave, with such passion and fervor, it was something he really only filed away for Roman. When you can’t use your words to express yourself, suppose the next course of action is, well, action. 

“I’m sorry,” Logan broke the kiss suddenly, his breath labored and forehead pressed against Janus’, “I’m not- I figured this way-”

“Yea, yea,” Janus responded, equally breathless. He pecked a kiss onto Logan lips, “It’s okay, dear,” He reconnected their lips for another passionate kiss. Janus hooked his leg around Logan’s waist, now sitting on top of his thighs. Without breaking this kiss, he gently pressed a hand to Logan’s chest, pushing him down onto the bed. 

“Wait,” Logan muttered, and readjusted his positioning so he was fully lying down, rather than his legs dangling off the edge, “Okay, sorry,” 

Janus let out a breath, “Is this-” 

“Yes, please,” Logan cut him off, and the other man gave him a smile before reconnecting them for a bruising kiss. Janus’ hands wandered to the hem of Logan’s shirt, placing his warm hands underneath it and light running his fingernails down his sides. This earned him a quiet moan and a teasing bit to his lip. 

Janus sat up, fiddling with the fabric once more, “You want this off?” 

Logan furrowed his brows and bit his lip, “Er, no, n-not yet, at least. I’m sorry,” 

He frowned, “Hey, Logan. Never apologise for being vocal about what you want, okay?” Logan nodded, his eyes darting across the room and sometimes making eye contact, “What is it, dear? Do you need to stop?”

Logan shook his head, vigorously, “No, no, not at all. I just… Am having trouble asking for what I want…” He trailed off. 

Janus raised his eyebrows, “I am here to make you happy, Logan. Ask for something, and I’ll do it. Worst that I’ll say is no, promise,” He leaned down and gave a soft kiss to Logan lips, much more intimate and chaste then what they have done thus far, something that was so sweet it made his teeth rot. 

“C-could you maybe… Y’know,” Logan swallowed thickly and then placed his hands above his head, looking at Janus and then back at his hands. Janus couldn’t help the smile that creeped onto his face, and before Logan could even react, he had tightly grabbed his wrists, pinning him in place. 

“Is that what you wanted, dear?” Janus said, trying to keep the teasing out of his voice, thankfully coming off more wanting and dominant. Logan wouldn’t have been able to say anything if he tried, especially not after Janus began kissing and sucking on his neck, barely being able to keep still and the small noises out of his throat. 

“I bet this is what you wanted me to do the first time I pinned you down, even with everyone watching, right?” Janus muttered into Logan’s neck, and Logan just whimpered in response, “I wanted it too, don’t worry. You are so beautiful, L,” 

Logan gasped when Janus bit down particularly hard on a fleshy part of his neck, sucking and making a very obvious mark there. Logan struggled against Janus’ grip but the man’s years of combat training left him very strong and muscular. He needed more.

“J-Janus,” Logan stuttered out, catching his attention. 

“Yes?” 

Logan’s hands were still pinned, so he gestured down to his chest with his head. 

“You want this off now?” Janus asked, instinctively running his hands underneath Logan’s shirt and across his chest. 

“Yes, please,” 

After everything, Janus will hold Logan as they talked about their feelings and what this means for them. He will give Logan all the time he needs, even if their conversation spans over a couple days. At their next self defense class, Virgil will tease Logan all day about the dull marks on his neck. Patton will only say something once, but the twins will give the pair knowing looks all day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'know that whole thing about Logan story with the friend from community college and getting physically sick when having to talk about feelings... Well... That is not based on exactly something that happened to me... Nope...
> 
> Comment if you enjoyed, I haven't done a Janus centered fic before, so this was a lot of fun.
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr: thealphabetmurders

**Author's Note:**

> Did you enjoy the dialogue in the beginning, because I'm still laughing, let me know.  
> Part Two coming soon! We get flustered Logan!!  
> Follow me on Tumblr: thealphabetmurders


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